”I sit there slack-jawed at all the effort they are willing to do to have me sign this contract. They must be very desperate. Lisa asks “Is that all to your satisfaction Jon?” I shook my head yes and reached out for the nearest pen and signed the form. “Good, Im glad you’re willing to help America Jon, from this point on we will monitor you until the termination or fruition of your contract. “How long will that be exactly?” I ask.“Well you signed an initial 5 year contract with an additional 10 year waiting period dependent on your performance.” She said. “Now we mustn’t waist anymore time Jon, please follow me to the processing area.” I was confused by the term “processing area”, but I shrugged it off and followed Lisa. I was escorted to what looked a laboratory and a bunch of nurses and scientists with clip boards looking me up and down. One of them came up to me and asked “When was the last time you masturbated Mr. Bartnet?” Totally taken off guard I stuttered “Excuse me?”“Look I’m. At high noon, a lone guard carrieda bucket of piss water to the black sweatbox, which shimmered in the heatradiating from its surface. He opened the small iron grating and scoopedout a ladleful to generously allow the parched princess to gulp down as muchpiss water as she liked. The guards, and indeed the Queen herself, had alldonated generously. It had been boiled down until it achieved a dark yellowcolour to concentrate its essence and render it tastier. In these circumstances,pee soup is best served hot. Her sandpaperdry throat and deep-fried brains prevented Princess Gwendolyn from questioningthe dubious provenance of the dark yellow soup. The sniggering guard wasn'tvolunteering any information as he held the ladle of stale-smelling, brackishliquid to her paper-dry lips. Her heat-basted body wasn't really functioningbeyond an overwhelming need for liquid replenishment. Squatting like a toad, poor dehydratedGwendolyn sipped gratefully at the putrid liquid. Highbred grace.
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